Tacenda

❝They say I'm an adamant child.
What else would I do? 
I wish I wasn't born.
I know it's too late. 
I'm 14 now.

There's another wish. 
I've locked it in out of fear,
of being labeled a monster. 
I wish to see "Her" in the coffin.
Don't judge.

I'm unwanted, have always been.
I had suicidal thoughts when I was only 3.
I just didn't know how to, back then. 
When I knew how, I lost both - 
My innocence and the courage to die.

Loner has been my tag,
Until she found me beside a bin
Crying pathetically, inconsolable. 
She took me in "Her" arms,
Wiped my tears and gave me water.

Sitting in the park, 
A word she did not talk. 
I looked into her eyes. 
I guess she read my thoughts. 
She waited along as if she was expecting someone.

I've known infuriating silence. 
What kind of silence is this? 
Saying nothing says the most. 
She left my hands and the place  
Only after I thanked her with a smile.

I wondered if this is care. 
Is this what I longed for? 
Don't we visit multiple shops
When something we need isn't found?
I'll do the same now on❞, he decided.

He cared for people around. 
His care started reciprocating. 
He is now a sober and loving youth.
He is no longer a sombre runaway.
He waits everyday to get a glance of her.

He remembers two females. 
They imparted him wisdom, 
The wisdom of power - He now knows
Whom he can let take control of his life.
He started living a life he always wanted. 

The first "her" whom he wanted to die 
Was his biological mother.
That "her" whom he met in the park 
Was his mother too.
She can't be just another stranger.

It was her who made him realize... 
    He can forgive himself. 
    Silence can speak too.
    Not all women are bad. 
    The essence of motherly love!

---

This is a piece of fiction inspired by an article where a differently-abled little boy shared his pain of belonging to a dysfunctional family, his depressive suicidal phase owing to an abusive mother, and how a teacher helped him overcome his situation and recover.

“I was worthy of her love whether she gave it to me or not. Every child is worthy of love.”

~ Richard Paul Evans

A life without a mother is difficult. But, the life of a child with a mother who harms is hell, with a choice to go nowhere. A huge proportion of homeless teens emerge as a result of maltreatment – physical abuse and negligence in most cases.

Even if we cannot be a complete support system, let’s pass on a smile to someone in distress. It might change their lives. Extending my warm virtual feelings to the suffering ones, I wish everyone out there with motherly love and instincts, a Happy Mother’s Day!

“I believe the choice to become a mother is the choice to become one of the greatest spiritual teachers there is.”

~ Oprah

The title Tacenda implies things that are better left unsaid to be passed on, or those that can be understood in silence.

Cheers!